GIFTS...

 I have had such a full life abundantly overflowing with a plethora of amazing gifts.  My heart is filled with gratitude.

My father was the best gift-giver.  His first gift to me was my mother.  He was a young man of 19 when hemet my mother.  He swept her off her feet on a dance floor when she was barely 17.  They were married on her 18th birthday and 5 years later, together, they gave me the gift of life.

As I grew, he discovered one of my favorite gifts was anything sweet.  He gave me the gift of a piano, followed by 9 years of piano lessons.  He gave me the gift of dance lessons--also for 9 years.  He gave me the gift of his wisdom.  

    --Correcting me when I made mistakes.

--Praising me when I made good choices.

He gave me the gift of patience.  Waiting for me to fund the rught way, and nudging me along the path.

He gave me the gift of  unconditional love.  I never understood that, until I had children of my own!  I knew he loved me when, one day, I asked him, "Daddy, you have given me so much all my life==what can I give you in return?"  I can see him still, dressed in his white shirt, white pants, a white apron tied around his waist, stained with the juices of meat and food preparation, and a white envelope hat on his head decorated with the little "pickle" pin which was the symbol of his restaurant.  

He was sitting on one of the 4-legged stools at one of the long tables at the restaurant.  His simple, yet profound answer to my question was this, "The only thing I ask of you in return is that you will always remain as good as you are right now."

That simple response brought tears to my eyes.  I leaned down to give him a kiss on the cheek and one of my tears rolled out of my eye and down his cheek.

I loved my dad dearly.  I can't say that I was always good--or that I always made good choices--but my dad's gift of forgiveness was always a given.

Writing about my earthly father gets me thinking about my Heavenly Father--the Father of my Spirit.  He has been the best bestower of the greatest gifts--and the list is long!    The first gift He gave me, like my dad, was the gift of my life.  And with that gift  came the gift of my parents.  I shall forever be grateful for them both.

My Father in Heaven gave me one brother and two sisters.  They have blessed my life in countless ways.  He also sent Angels to me, called "friends"--each in their own season--some still grace my life.

He gave me many talents--some I have already discovered, some I am still discovering, and  some I am yet to discover.

He gave me the gift(s) of my own family(s).  First He sent me Gerry Henderson, a Graduate Student at BYU, who swept this little Freshman of barely 18 off of my feet, just as my dad had done with my mom all those years ago.  We were married the following June.  Then came five beautiful children, each one a treasured gift.  Growing old together was not in the cards for us.  Gerry went to live with Heavenly Father  much too soon!  

Six months after Gerry's death, I met Dean Mickelson.  He was charming, a great talker.  We met on "The Love Boat!"  It was crazy--and this young man truly was an answer to a lonely widow's prayers. He truly was a gift from God.

My next gift was our son, Billy.  He, too was an answer to many prayers.

Heavenly Father gave to me the gift of music. He gave me fingers to play the piano and ears to hear the music, and a heart to feel it in my soul.  He gave me feet to dance to the music.  I heard the rhythm to keep the beat and a body to move with it.  I feel the music throughout my whole being.  He gave me a voice to sing through both my heart and soul.

These gifts  were only for a season.  I can no longer play the piano because my eyes are growing dim;  I can no longer dance because my body no longer moves the way it used to; my voice is no longer sweet and pure.  But I am grateful for the years I could do all these things.  Now, I have ears  to hear the music and I can close my eyes and visualize the past.

So many gifts --too numerous to list----my Heavenly Father has bestowed upon me!  So much to be grateful for.  These are certainly note-worthy  gifts in my life--but the greatest gift of all is the gift of a tiny baby, born in a stable long, long ago in the town of Bethlehem.  The Father gave us the gift of His Son.  And His name was called, Jesus Christ.  "For God so loved the world that He gave His only begotten Son..." (John 3:16)

The Father gifted The Son--The Son gifted to us Eternal Life.

So many gifts!  So much LOVE!

                                                Keep on Giving!

                                                Merry Christmas!

Through The Eyes of a Dreamer...

 I have always been a dreamer.  Even when I was a very small girl.  I remember lying on my back on our front lawn and, looking up at the clouds, I would dream of being able to fly up there in that vast expanse and sit on the very top of one of them.  I imagined that I saw many different shapes in those clouds...shapes like animals or people or castles in the sky.  I don't know where I got my imaginative power; I only know that it has been with me for a very long time.

I believe that is where my writing skills were born.  Making up stories and/or poems has been something I have dabbled at for decades.  Mostly, I do it for my own pleasure, but I have occasionally done it for publication.  I have several books of poems that some of my works have been published in and a very real recognition (to me, at least) by a Poetry Society.

I wrote a short story about the life of my father's adventure in the restaurant business in Santa Monica, California.  His restaurant was called "Pickle Bill's Barbecue," and so I titled my book, "Memories of a Pickle Kid."  It sold over 100 copies!

My husband and I are both retired now--Dean after 41 years as a Pharmacist, and I after 35 years as an ICU/ER/Flight Nurse.  We both needed something to fill all those empty hours in the day, so we have launched a new project called Healthy Sense Living.

Now, here I am, with my husband, putting together a Website that deals with products which enhance our five senses.  Let me explain.  The Website is called HealthySenseLiving.Com.  We search for products that are for sale on our site that are pleasing to what we SEE (Visual), what we HEAR (hearing), what we SMELL (Aromatherapy), what we FEEL (touch), and what we TASTE (through healthy eating).

Here is an excerpt from our "About Us" page:  "As two healthcare professionals with combined medical experience spanning 76 years, we have become more keenly aware of the benefits of preventative medicine regarding stress reduction for better health.

"We all, in our busy lives, need some 'settling down' time.  Settling down to what?  To your body, mind and spirit on this user friendly website in order to fulfill your needs in your healthier living environment."

Now, you might be asking, "What has all of this got to do with my imagination and writing?  Well, let me explain.  I believe that it takes imagination to venture out into any new project in life.  I have filled my cup with my writing; I have filled my soul with writing my stories and poems; now my husband and I are imagining something new and different.  Will we succeed?  We hope so.  But that is not the important part of this new adventure.  We want you to succeed.  We want you to find fulfillment through your five senses, just as we have throughout our life.

I am inviting you to visit our website and browse through the offerings there.  It is only the beginning, so come back often to see what we might have added to or taken away from the site.  We are hoping that through this new adventure we can bring some insight into your lives about what it feels like, smells like, looks like, sounds like, or tastes like to slow down a little and find peace to your soul through Healthy Sense Living.

   

Visit us at HealthySenseLiving.com

Catching Up...and Moving On...

 Every day I sit for awhile and ponder my life.  I have experienced many ups and downs...some of my own creation...others leveled upon me without any help from me at all.  I wanted to record the progression of my aging process so that my children could get a glimpse at what they might face when they have lived as long as I have.

I have a talk with my body every once in a while, just to check in to see how it is doing.  For a woman my age, who has pushed my body through ma y rigorous activities, like ballet and toe dancing for most of my young years, hiking steep trails into mountains, swimming rivers and lakes, skiing and water skiing, a little golf (I never was very good at it!) and yes, even playing the piano.  Plus, I bore 6 children!  All of these should have left me with a ton of arthritis, but what little I have is endurable.  The only bone I ever broke was a toe when I was 13-\ years-old...and, oh yes, a chip fracture in my thumb after our automobile accident last September.  I have been pretty good to my body over the years and it, in turn, has been good to me.

I have had 3 abdominal surgeries, 5 eye surgeries, a bore-hole craniotomy for a head bleed, and most of my teeth pulled.  It could have been much worse.  My vision is crappy!  I inherited my dad's Glaucoma and my mom's Macular Degeneration.  Because of this, I don't drive anymore.  I have a difficult time reading anything unless the font is THIS BIG!  And I can't do any kind of close work,  My hearing us awful,  EH?  And my feet have lost their feeling...Neuropathy...also inherited from my mother.  But my body tells me that if I don't give up on it, it won't give up on me...just yet!

I have been so blessed to have my cognitive abilities still intact.  My memory is sharp, my ability to reason is intact, and I recognize everyone in my life still.  Sometimes, if I haven't seen them for a long time, I have a hard time realizing that that little girl I used to brush her hair as a child has grown into a mature, lovely woman!  Recognizing that they age too, throws me sometimes!  For these blessing, I am eternally thankful, because so much of my brain power could have been wiped out when I suffered my head bleed in 2012.

Why am I writing this?  I think it is because I wanted to keep a Diary or Journal, if you will, to help me track any signs of decline.  I am soon to be 81-years-old.  My mother lived to be 86 and in the last few years of her life I watched her body dwindle down to a frail 86 pounds and her cognitive abilities only slowly decline.  In the end, she didn't know my sister.  I tell myself it was because she couldn't take care of her and we ad to put her in a Nursing Facility.   She was nearly blind and needed a walker to take the few steps she was able to take.

So, over the next months and years, I shall check in here and leave a "progress (or regress) report" so those who come after me can read it.  This is my life!

Experience Leads to Compassion

I have been trying to come up with something to write about for the past several weeks, and every time I would sit down to write, I came up empty.  It's not that there hasn't been a multitude of subjects to talk about, it's just that I couldn't wrap my heart around any of them.

Today, however, I was blind-sided by the experiences of a dear friend that turned my thoughts away from the news of the day and toward something altogether different and perhaps a lot more important.  It is the subject of Compassion!  What is compassion?

Modern definitions would include "Sympathetic pity and concern for the sufferings or misfortunes (of others)."  Webster describes it this way.  I would go a step or two further and say that it is more like after walking the same type of path another is walking, we are able to feel what they are feeling.  In other words, what they are experiencing, we once experienced.  Therefore, we can empathize and feel compassion for their experience.

My friend is going through horrendous experiences right not and she has confided in me about them.  Why me?  Because I have experienced these things before in my past.  I can relate to her experiences and perhaps offer some degree of help by sharing with her what I have learned.  We have a compatible relationship and a common bond because of this.  I can offer her my compassion.

While helping another, I turned to my own life and found that I am trying to show compassion to myself. That sounds a bit strange, but we all can use a little compassion in our lives..  I am going through some really hard physical and emotional trials right not.  I am suffering from AMD (Adult onset Macular  Degeneration.). I am slowly going blind.  I say slowly, because I have had significant vision loss in my right eye for  17 years.  That loss of vision was caused by a stroke within my right eye which destroyed the Optic Nerve...or most of it.  What vision I have left in that eye is useless.

Four years ago, the AMD in my left eye went suddenly from the dry stage to the wet stage and has ultimately left me with a blindspot in the center of that eye.  I received treatment immediately with intravitreal injections with the drug, Ranibizumab or Lucentis.    This inhibits the growth of tiny vessels, which occlude the vision.  Though this is not a cure, it can slow the progression of the AMD.    I hav e had a total of 9 injections plus one Laser treatment.  My AMD was slowed down and for 3 1/2 years, did not progress.

In the last 6 months, I have noticed a worsening of the vision or the blindspot in my left eye.  At this time, I do not have a Retinal Specialist that I can depend on to see me.  The one I had is in Phoenix and comes to Prescott at least once a month.  My problem with him is that I cannot seem to connect with anyone who can make me an appointment with him.  So, I am searching for another one.  I am in a dilemma.  And I am very hard on myself.  I am in a hard place.

All of this has turned my heart to my own mother.  She also had this degenerating disease.  I remember how sad she was when she could no longer read books or her scriptures.  I tried to get her to listen to books on tape or her scriptures on tape, but she was not interested.  She got very despondent.  The next thing she had to give up was her ability to drive a car.  Slowly, her independence was being taken away from her and her depression worsened.

I was not kind to my mother back then.  I grew impatient with her and had a hard time being around her.    I was looking at her glass half empty and could not feel what she was feeling.  I now can feel every bit of her pain, because I am going through the same process.  I cannot drive any more; I cannot read a book or my scriptures; I need a very large and stron magnifying glass to read the screen of mat computer; and I need the aid of head-gear magnifiers to crochet the little baby blankets I am making for my new G-Granddaughters.  Because of my experiences, I can appreciate my mother's even more.  It is too bad that she is in Heaven, because I want to hug her tight and tell her how very sorry I am.

Through all of this, I am reminded that I have a Savior who loves name and I know He will carry me through my own experiences; and I know He will carry my friend through hers as well.  I love my Savior and I love that He is always there for us.  He has walked where we walk; He has experienced our pains and frustrations; He has sunk to the depths of the Hell that we are going through; and He has great compassion for each and every one of us.

Now, let us take those experiences and this knowledge and be more compassionate toward others...whether or not we have experienced their pains.  We can show an increase of love for them and offer our help to them to get them through their life's experiences.

Fear, Panic, Chaos...The New Pandemic...

For my readers who know me and know that I am a rational person, I have the following to offer as a solution, or at best a suggestion for the current insanity that has taken over the world.

There is a new strain of a Virus circling the globe, called  The Coronavirus.  Technically, it is called Cobi-d19.  The Media has hyped it up to be "the worst virus ever!"  And it has folks scared out of their wits.  Schools have closed, churches have ceased services, businesses have closed their doors and people have put themselves in voluntary quarantine all across the country.  Some places in Europe have made the quarantines mandatory for a period of 2-4 weeks.

Fear has caused people to start hoarding items such as toilet paper, water, hand sanitizer, masks and gloves.  Soup cans are flying off the shelves, and the low supply has caused people to panic.  And with that panic, has come a chaos seen only when there is a national disaster.

Rational people have become irrational, believing the worst.  Some are predicting a Dooms Day of sorts.  I can only shake my head and look at what is going on around me as insane.  Calm down, people!  Get a grip on reality.  I have lived through probably 8 or 9 so called "Pandemics" in my lifetime...LIVED THROUGH THEM, FOLKS!  And I have never seen anything like this.

Common sense tells me that if you take care of yourselves and avoid large crowds, wash your hands after using the bathroom or working in the yard  (something my mother taught me to do as a little child) or even cleaning house, you are protecting yourself.  We don't need to walk around wearing masks, unless you have a fever or cough and your loved ones don't want to catch your germs.  Cough or sneeze into a tissue and throw it in the garbage immediately, or cough in the crook of your arm.  COMMON SENSE, PEOPLE!

Eat a healthy diet and hydrate yourself.  Good nutrition and water are essential to staying well.  Take your medications and vitamins and even add a little extra Vitamin C.

If you feel you have symptoms, consult your Doctor.  He/She will advise you what to do.  Our Emergency Rooms and Hospitals are overrun by people who think they might have the virus and are demanding the testing  and they are panicking.  And for goodness sake, DO NOT CALL 911!  It is not an emergency...unless, of course, you have severe respiratory (breathing) problems.

All of the articles that I have read, written by Doctors, give this advice and they have done studies that show, for the most part, the majority of people will survive many and all viruses that come along...using common sense.  Don't listen to the media who want you to believe that this epidemic is the equivalent to the Black Death or the Plague that killed thousands in England and Europe a couple of centuries ago.  It was a horrible plague, but keep in mind that they didn't;t have the technological advances that we have today, nor did they have the proper medicines to fight it.

These things come in cycles and we have survived them before without all the hype we hear today.  Fear, panic, and chaos are the only Pandemic that we should eradicate.  So, don't let fear of the unknown blind you to the realities and don't let your fears lead to panic,  because panic eventually leads to chaos...and we certainly don't need anymore chaos in this country.  Replace your fear with faith in God and prayer and you will come to a calm place, just as I have.  God's not done with this country yet.  He has much work yet to be done and he needs good, calm, rational people to carry it out.

Just saying!

Fractured...

I have come to a time in my life when I realize that none of us get through our journey without some affliction or another causing stress points in our spirits.  Some of those stress points are in the form of some form of mental distress or another result in fractures.  Fractures in our hearts and in our spirits.  Think for a moment about the different stresses put on our bodies, either from physical trauma or just hard use, as in a "stress fracture" to a bone.

Some of our afflictions are brought on by others...some, we put upon ourselves.  God never intended for us to go through this journey without experiencing some sort of affliction or trial.  In His wisdom, those trials serve to make us stronger.   And He has not left us alone to carry our burdens without help.

I am reminded of  the talk, "Like A Broken Vessel," given as a Conference address in 2013 by Elder Jeffrey R. Holland, of The Quorum of the Twelve Apostles, The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints:

"When we struggle, brothers and sisters--mental or emotional or physical or otherwise--do not vote against the preciousness of life by ending it!  Trust in God.  Hold on in His love.  Know that one day the day will break bright and all shadows of mortality will flee.  Though we feel we are "like a broken vessel," as the Psalmist says, we must remember, that vessel is in the hands of the divine potter.  Broken minds are healed just the way broken bones and broken hearts are healed.  While God is at work making those repairs, the rest of us can be merciful, nonjudgemental and kind."

I have felt this healing in my own life.  I have witnessed it in the lives of others.  When we turn our full attention on the healing power of the Savior, let Him into our lives, and Trust in Him, then I promise that there is Hope.  If you think your life is permanently fractured and there is nothing left for you, think again!  Step back from the ledge and ponder the miracles in your life.  If He can provide miracles, then He can provide healing.

Words...

The sharpest weapon in the world is the tongue.  And related to it is the pen.  Think of those two weapons and what flows off of them both?  Words!

I remember as a child being the recipient of words that hurt!  Teasing words, unkind words, sharp words, degrading words...all meant to torment a child who did not understand.  My mother taught me a little saying, "Sticks and stones may break my bones, but words can never hurt me!"  I tried to use that phrase over and over again, but in the end, it just wasn't true.  Words did hurt me!  And I cried a lot because I didn't think anybody liked me.

I grew up with a soft heart, easily crushed, but eventually I learned to toughen my skin so the barbs couldn't get through.  My first husband taught me that.  And I ask myself a lot, "What would Jesus do?"

How many of us have heard "a discouraging word" at any time in our lives?  I know I have ~ and some of my family members have.  How many of us have used these same words, or others to discourage others?

Words can be either uplifting or they can tear down.  They are the building blocks of our language.  Since our language was a God-given gift to mankind it behooves us to use it carefully.

God's words are not discouraging words.  His words are a guide for us, from a foundation of love, and are found in His Holy Scriptures.   It is there that I turn to read His words when I need answers to daily struggles.  And it is there that I turn to read the words that tell of the holiest of events ever to transpire upon the face of the earth ~ the Birth of our Lord and Savior, Jesus Christ.

What were the words used there to tell mankind about the coming of His Son to the earth?  They were kind words.  Words of promise that invited the spirit to feel peace.  The Lord proclaimed these words through many Prophets many hundreds of years before the Holy Babe was born.

Isaiah was one of those Prophets.  "...Behold a Virgin shal conceive, and bare a Son, and shall call His name Emmanuel (Hebrew for 'with us is God')."  (Isaiah 7:14.). The most beautiful, peaceful words I have ever read!  He was the promised Messiah...born a babe, but he would grow up to be a man.  And it was this man, our Savior, Jesus Christ, who spoke some other beautiful words.  He gave us a new commandment: to "Love the Lord our God with all our hearts, mind and strength."  And a second commandment, like the first, to "love our neighbors as ourselves."

Our words should always be spoken with that love.  Our words should also be written with that love.  I am a clumsy speaker because sometimes I feel things that are not in tune with the spirit and I want to say the right things, but quite often they come out wrong and I am misunderstood.  In most of those cases, I choose to remain silent and wait for those feelings to pass.  But, in other times, I do speak out with heightened emotions, and I am immediately sorry for opening my mouth to speak.  I am deeply sorry if anyone has been the recipient of my clumsy speech.

Let us all remember that there is a time to speak and there is a time to be silent.  And more importantly, let your speech be filled with love for one another.  This should be our challenge for this New Year of 2020.  Love one another and treat one another with kindness...even if it means to bite your tongue!