Ramblings on a Sunday..."FATHER'S DAY!"

I love to go to Church on Father's Day and heat all of the wonderful tributes paid to any number of Father's in the Speaker's life.  It opens the windows of my memory and helps me to keep the Fathers who have touched my life close.  I was grateful this particular Sunday for one talk that touched my deepest memories.  MY HEAVENLY FATHER, MY OWN EARTHLY FATHER, THE FATHERS OF MY CHILDREN, AND FINALLY MY CHILDREN AS FATHERS.

When I think of my HEAVENLY FATHER, my mind's eye cannot picture His face...but I can picture all of His creations and I marvel at His work's.  I am a Spirit Child of my Heavenly Father.  I love Him and I know that He loves me.  He is and has always has been there for me.  He hears and answers my every prayer and leads me upon the right path. 


My life has been a very long journey and it has taken me decades to understand the complexity of a "Father's" love for me.  Whenever I pray selfishly, my answers do not come in the form that I would desire, but I understand the wisdom of His answers.  He has allowed me to have those selfish desires of my heart from time to time, and I have learned that "my will" is not the better path to follow.,  And only God knows the wisdom of keeping me off that path and directing me to a better one.


Oh, that I could have learned these things by another path and at a much younger age, I could have avoided a great deal of heartache.  But...would I have learned the lesson?  That I cannot answer.  Even at my age, I struggle with the lessons of my past and pray that my children and grandchildren...and now, even my great-grandchildren...will do better than I have done.


Through all of life's ups and downs, difficult6 crossroads, times of good health and times when the body fails us, I do not run away from any opportunity to fold my arms, bow my head, and visit with my HEAVENLY FATHER!

If you read carefully, The Proclamation on The Family, "Parents have a sacred duty to rear their children in love and righteousness, to provide for their physical and spiritual needs, to teach them to love and serve one another, to observe the commandments of God and to be law-abiding citizens wherever they live.  Husbands and wives--mothers and fathers--will be held accountable before for the discharge of these obligations."

This is the Divine Role of a Father (and Mother).  As I conjure up the memories of my FATHER, .I can honestly say that he fulfilled his obligation.  He was a loving and a righteous Father!  He definitely provided for our every need.  He worked tirelessly--even to the last day of his life--for his wife and family.  Did he teach his children to love and serve one another?  I can without hesitation say that he did.  Even though there are years separating all four of his children,  (22 years from oldest to youngest), one of us or another was there to help, support, lift up, and love each other.

My dad was the most honest man I ever have known.  He lived the Commandments...He loved his God, he attended and magnified his callings in his church; He loved his wife and family and never broke those sacred covenants made at the Alter of God;  and He obeyed not only God's laws, but also the laws of his country. 

My FATHER fulfilled his Divine Role.  He taught me the way I should go in order to attain Eternal Life.  He truly taught me whether it was through the scriptures or through the lessons I needed to learn, that life sometimes introduced bumps in the road for us...and we don't always choose the right path.  He was there for me to help place my feet upon the proper path.  His love for me (and for all of his children) was unconditional.

I love you, Daddy, and I miss you terribly.  I still need you to lead me.

How sad I don't have a picture of Gerry, my first Husband, the FATHER OF MY FIVE CHILDREN on this computer.  I shall have to correct that one day in the future.  (Oops...I found one!)

Gerald Vernon Henderson was an awesome husband and father.  The five children that we brought into this world together are proof of his righteous "discharge of (the) obligations" listed in The Proclamation.  My only regret to this day is that I did not recognize his greatness until after he was gone.  He provided some of the most memorable family vacations with the children.  Each one has their own special memories of those trips...whether it was our annual water-skiing trips to Lake Powell or our skiing trips to Utah, or our special togetherness times in the mountains of Northern California. 

His "Fatherhood" was  cut way too short, but the legacy he left behind pays honor and tribute to him as a father through his children,   Kimberlee, Mark, Debra, JerriAnne and Heather have all magnified the teachings of their father in their lives. 

He left us February 7, 1981.  Funny, though, he still leads this family and several of us have felt his spirit near in times of happiness or sorrow.  He was there holding me up when my father died; he was there doing the same when I lost my mother; he was there in the operating rooms of my many eye and brain surgeries; he has been in attendance at every marriage of his children; he was there to comfort me when I lost my little sister, Patti recently; and he was there at Patti's "Celebration of Life" in St. George, Utah when Dean picked up Gerry's trumpet and played "Journey Home" beautifully.

Dean and I were married (1) April 25, 1982, and (2) August 8, 1999.  We both had issues that we had to iron out of our lives and it took nearly 12 years to do that.  Our first marriage brought forth a son, William (Billy) Jens Mickelson; Dean's second marriage (to Laurie Phelps) brought Eliot Dean Mickelson into his family.  I have had an opportunity to watch Dean develop his FATHER'S role.  He loves his two sons, and he loved his little step-daughter, Heather.  He felt and feels a great deal of responsibility for being able to teach them all correct principles and how to govern their own lives.  In these areas, he has succeeded.  Heather, Billy and Eliot have all grown up to be  the possessors or amazing minds!  Billy and Eliot in music and Heather in the loving, caring aptitude of the Nurse's heart!


I am so grateful for the fathers in my lifer and hope and pray that I have and will live up to their teachings and examples.  It is an amazement to me that my grandchildren are having children!  I was just getting used to getting to know and love the grandchildren (now numbering 19...and holding).  My two sons, Mark and Billy are both developing into loving and responsible fathers.  God bless their efforts..

Mark with his Guard Dog!





 
             Billy with Rania and Maya!






My Grandchildren have given this growing family 12 great-grandchildren (number 13 is on the way).  All FATHERS are doing their job splendidly!

To all FATHERS in and out of the church--old and young--wise and foolish--beware my watching eye (because I am a people watcher)--allows me to smile when I observe the love exchanged between FATHER and child; or frown when I observe those exchanges of "misguided love."  I am praying for all of you.  Learn from these words and reflect on the words of The Proclamation.

From the great play (which I loved) "The King and I," and as quoted by President Thomas S. Monson of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints in his article "Happiness...The Universal Quest," let me end with this: "The king of Siam lay dying.  Anna's son asks her this question, 'Was he as good...as he could have been?'  Anna answers wistfully, 'I don't think any man has ever been as good...as he could have been...but he tried.'"  I would say this of all Fathers on this day.  You may not be "as good as you could be," but never stop trying.  I love you all.  I thank my HEAVENLY FATHER for continuing to love and support me; my EARTHLY FATHER for all that he taught me and for the example he was for me and his family; the  FATHERS OF MY CHILDREN for carrying on what their own fathers taught them and giving our sons a clear example of what a father should be; and I thank my sons, who are now FATHERS for giving back to your fathers the gift of responsible family oriented love and admiration.

And to my Grandsons, who are now FATHERS, God bless you on your journey...never give up hope for the future.  Your children have a great destiny and what you teach them now will help them plow through whatever is in store for them and their posterity.  A FATHER'S job is not an easy one, but is a job that follows in God, THE FATHER'S footsteps.  He laid down the foundation. 

Counting My Blessings...

This is why I love Oregon!  We manage to swim through the fall and winter rains, and then comes April!  Rhododendrons are the most beautiful flowers and they are popping out everywhere!  They are Oregon's flowers and we lovingly call them "Rhodies!"  It's like the earth comes to life...a fitting reminder of the Resurrection.  We muddle through the winters of our lives and at the end, we are promised a new day...a new life...and I imagine beautiful flowers everywhere.

For the past few weeks, the topics and lessons chosen for our Church meetings seem to have been directed just at me.  The Atonement has been spoken and taught in so many interesting ways and the message has driven home to my heart with a new understanding and gratitude for the burden our Savior took upon His shoulders for "me!"

This past Sunday, the messages included some very important points about families and the role of Fathers in our lives.  I didn't realize I had so many "Fathers!"  The first Father I knew was my earthly Father, who watched over me, provided for my needs and taught me the survival skills I would need to get through this earthly life.  The second Father I knew, was my Heavenly Father.  Like my earthly Father, I learned that He also watched over me, provided for my needs and I learned from His Holy Scriptures the survival skills that I would need to return to Him and live in His Kingdom one day.

The third Father I learned about was Jesus Christ, the Son of God, and the Father of this earth, because He created it.  Like my own Father and my Heavenly Father, Jesus Christ also watches over me and loves me, provides answers to my prayers if I will but ask.  "Seek and ye shall find, Knock and it shall be opened up to you." ()  And His loving words set my feet upon the path "home!"

I learned that our Bishop, the Father of our Ward, is also on his watchtower watching over his flock.  And, likewise, our Prophet as the Father of the Church, sending out his messengers to make sure that his flock is secure.  The very word "Father" has such a deeply profound meaning and because I have been given this food for thought, I find that I am ever more grateful for all of the Fathers in my life.

Like the Calililies that bloom every year faithfully around the Easter Season, (and I apologize for the poor picture, but I promise there are some very pretty ones on the other side of the bush), I am reminded once again of my Savior...the Father of my earthly tabernacle.  In California, when I was a kid, we called these lilies "Easter Lilies" because they bloom at this time of the year,  There are other lilies that do the same thing, but these are the lilies of my childhood.

"Because I have been given much" is a favorite Hymn of mine...every day I give thanks for the bounties that bless my life.  And today I am grateful for the beautiful flowers that grace this amazing Northwest state of Oregon that I live in.  Thanks to my earthly father who taught me to see and appreciate these beauties; thanks to my Heavenly Father for giving me this life and the eyes to behold the beauty all around me; thanks to my Savior for giving me the hope of a new life and for His abundant creations; thanks to all of the Bishops in my life who have guided my steps on paths that lead me in the right direction; and thanks to our Prophet, Thomas S. Monson and all of Prophets of the past, who watches over all of us and sens their messages to us so we can grow.

Oh, what a wonderful world we live in!

Faith...Hope...Love...

Several years ago I got a necklace that I adore.  It has three round charms that hang from a golden chain.  On each charm is written a word, accompanied by a gemstone.  One charm is a Rosy color, another is silver and the third is gold.  On the Gold charm is written "Believe."  That is the equivalent of Faith.

When I was a very small girl living in California, I shared a room with my older brother.  In spite of the comfort that he was there with me, there were many nights when I was afraid.  I did not like the dark and my bed was positioned directly under a window that my mother liked to keep open a crack to let in fresh air.  I remember on more than one occasion calling out to my "mommy" to come comfort me because I was afraid.  She would come into my room and teach me about Jesus and tell me that if I would pray to him whenever I was afraid, He would send His angels to protect me.  And so, I would crawl out from under my covers, kneel beside my bed and with my head in my mother's lap, I would pray.  It was miraculous to me how every time it worked!  My fears departed and I was no longer afraid.  The dark "monsters" under my bed, or lurking outside of my window, would leave me and a peace prevailed in my room.  I never saw the Angels, but I knew they were there!

As I have traveled through this, my life's journey, I have had so many, many times when I had to call upon my faith to get me through situations that I could not get through alone.  I learned that by closing my eyes, saying a heartfelt prayer and taking that leap of faith that Angels lifted me.  I am so grateful for my mother for teaching me early to have the faith I have today.

The second charm, the Rose colored one bears the word "Trust."  Like Faith, if we Trust in the Lord or have Hope in the Lord, we can accomplish all things.  When I was a young mother of five beautiful children, I took upon my shoulders the daunting task of going back to school to study to become a Nurse.  I was 35 years old and hadn't been in college in a very long time.  But, I squared my shoulders, took all of the necessary entrance exams and Trusted with the Hope that I possessed that Heavenly Father would see me through this.  Never once did I leave Him out of the equation.  I prayed before I studied, I prayed before I took a test, and I prayed during every facet of the learning process.  If I can do it, you can do it, too.  The trust I have in my Heavenly Father has given me Hope every day that I live.

The third charm, the Silver one, says "Love."

In scripture, Jesus' answer to "Which is the greatest Commandment" was:  "The first and greatest commandment is this: Thou shalt love the Lord Thy God with all thy might, mind and strength...and the second is like unto it, thou shalt love thy neighbor as thyself."

Jesus said, "Love everyone."  By following His example, we can.  He loved little children and they flocked to him.  They could feel His love.  He loved the sinner and comforted them and said to them, "Go, and sin no more."  He loved His enemies and prayed for them.  I picture Him in Gethsemane praying for EVERYONE!  As He Atoned for our sins, our imperfections, our trials, our hurts, our illnesses...He experienced each and every one of them...the pain was so excruciating that He bled from every pore of His body.  In my Nursing Career, I have had many experiences and some that I have wished I could have born some of the pains that I saw.  I watched a man die after ingesting a whole bottle of Aspirin and then not being discovered until the next morning.  He bled from every orifice and his pain was excruciating.  Death was a gentle release for this man.

Even on the Cross, as our Savior hung and suffered, He showed His love for others.  He told the robber He would be with Him in Paradise, and He asked His Father to "...forgive them, Father, for they know not what they do."

Such great love "hath no man, than this...that He lay down His life for a friend."  He laid down His life for us.  All of us.  I pray that I can have and give such great love.

I believe that my Savior's love is sufficient and that one day I will live again and walk and talk with Him and that I will be able to thank Him for all that He has done and continues to do for me.  He calms my fears, He gives me Hope for a brighter tomorrow, and He confirms my Belief in Him with His Love for me.

This has been a remarkable Sunday!

The Artists in My Family...

There is a long line of artists in my family.  From the musically inclined to those who dance to  visual arts...there are so many examples.  My grandparents on my father's side loved music.  My Grandfather played both the fiddle and the guitar; my Grandmother played the mandolin, harmonica and the guitar.  Together they entertained many family members as well as folks out for a good time at an open air dance event.

My mother didn't play a musical instrument, but she had an Angel's voice and loved to sing to us as we were rowing up and also in our Church's Choir.  My dad also had a wonderful voice, but he was too busy with earning a living that he didn't share it very often.  He was a wonderful dancr, however, and that is how he and mom met...at a dance.  They loved to go to the Aragon Ballroom on the Santa Monica Pier and dance to the live music of Lawrence Welk.

My brother and sisters and I inherited many of their talents.  Darell has a wonderful voice and has sung in many venues over the years; Chrisie also sings well and plays the guitar.  She entertained in numerous venues in St. George for a period of time.  Patricia had a beautiful voice, but didn't share it except with family members.  Me?  Music and dance were my fortes.  I have lovred to sing sincr I was a very young child.  I had lead parts in numerous church productions in my youth and early 20's.  I also loved to dance.  Ballet, Toe, Acrobatic and Tap dancing were my favorites.  I also loved ballroom dancing and participated in numerous church dance festivals in my youth.  I also loved the piano and had a feel for music.  Thirteen years of piano instruction gave me my love for the instrument; however, I have a hard time reading music quickly, because I learned to "play by ear" and in my youth memorized music in this fashion.

Each of my children have inherited their own gifts.  Kimberly is a most gifted Interior Designer, and she holds a Master's Degree in Interior Design,  Every hone she has lived in is a work of art!  Mark expresses his gift in his craft of Stair Building.  He has earned many "Golden Chisel" awards for his amazingly beautiful stairs.   In his youth, he picked up a guitar and taught himself to play by ear.  He was a mean rock star!  Later, Mark found he loved to draw.  He has a feel and gift for art., Debi is gifted in many areas.  She has taken up the art lately of playing the guitar and does a wonderful job.  She also has a wonderful voice.  Her main gift, however, is in the field of sports.  From baseball to volleyball to running to cycling to keeping her body trim and toned in the gym, she excels in everything she tries.  Photography is also a gift that she shares with her sister, Heather.  Heather  has many gifts.  When she was young, we put her in dance classes and she blossomed from there.  I loved to watch her dance on the stage and I miss that.  She also has a beautiful voice but only shares it at home.  She does beautiful work with a camera and has formed her own business.  From what I hear, her clients are well pleased with her wok.  Billy is my musician.  I'm sure he inherited this from both sides of the family tree.  When he was but a wee little boy, we introduced him to the violin, and then the piano.  When he was 15, he picked up the guitar and blew our minds when he just took off playing everything he heard.  It was amazing.  He formed several bands in his youth, and then he picked up a cello I bought for myself and taught himself to play that instrument.  The cello has become his instrument of choice and he has made a career out of his musical gifts...both playing and writing his own compositions and performing all across America and throughout Europe.

This brings me to JerriAnne.  When she was very young, she was concerned that she had no talents or gifts.  I told her to be patient, and "in the due time of the Lord they would be manifested unto her."  In high school, she discovered she was good at sports, particularly running.  She joined the cross country team and blossomed into a wonderful, graceful runner.  She had also played softball when she was much younger, but that was not her sport.  She was a runner!  In College, she began with a major in Architecture and found drawing was a gift that she had.  From there, she began to use that talent and draw many beautiful things.   Currently, she is working on her Master's Degree in Special Education, focusing on working with the blind.  She has a gift of working with special needs children and has worked in a Charter School assisting with their needs.

And so, this brings me to the purpose of writing this episode in my life.  A few years ago, while living in St. George, Utah and working as a flight nurse with a Life Flight Team, I had an experience that has stayed with me for a very long time.  On one flight to Salt Lake City, it was a particularly stormy day (and flying is NOT fun in those storms).  We landed in Salt Lake, transported our patient to LDS Hospital via Ambiance, and returned to our plane to board for the flight home.  As we were taking off, and had reached an elevation of maybe 1500 feet, I chanced to look back and I saw the most beautiful sight.  There behind us, encircled with clouds, stood the Salt Lake Temple.  There was a break in the clouds just above the Temple and the rays of the sun shown perfectly towards it, bathing it in light.  And to make the picture complete, there was a perfect rainbow in the sky behind the Temple.  Oh, how I wist I had brought a camera!  But I didn't, so I had to keep that memory emblazoned in my memory.

I mentioned this experience to JerriAnne on one of my visits to Provo and asked if she could draw me a picture based only on my narrative of the experience.  She told me she would  try.  And try she did!  I just received the finished product via UPS the other day and was delighted with the results.  It is that piece of artwork that I am sharing here today.

Everything Crooked...

I'm sure everyone is familiar with the old Nursery Rhyme "There Was A Crooked Man"...well, I'm not even pretending to be that "Crooked Man," but I thought this would be an ideal visualization of what my AMD has done to my vision.  Because it has progressed to the "wet stage," this  is how my world looks through my degenerating eyes.  My world is crooked.

When this first happened to me, I thought of Van Gogh, one of my favorite artistsm, with his somewhat distorted images in his art.  We all know from his history that he had problems with his ears and vertigo, but perhaps he also had problems with his vision.  Perhaps he also had AMD.  Just an observation, not based on any truth or historical documentation.

Perhaps one day, through the workings of miraculous modern medicine, they will develop a permanent cure for this disease; meanwhile, I shall continue with the monthly injections into the eye and hope and pray for good results.  Perhaps one day my world will not be distorted any more, but return to its normal, beautiful scenes and the beautiful people in each picture.

The Old Grandfather Clock..

They carried the old Grandfather Clock out the door today.  I watched it pass through the doorway until it disappeared and I felt an old familiar pulling at the heartstrings that I have felt many times before.  The old faithful Grandfather Clock that has stood against many walls in many homes through the years keeping time for us to be punctual for whatever meeting, appointment, bedtime or rising in the morning.  The only time it missed a beat was when it was taken apart and moved to its new home...or the time it needed repairs so it could once again march to the tick-tock of the beat of its heart.

It was a wedding present we gave to each other shortly after we were married in April of 1982.  Thirty-four years it has stood, keeping watch over our little family.  It was there to witness the move into the home we built on Taos Mesa;  it was there in the little Victorian house we bought in Raton and it witnessed a new life enter into our midst.  Little Billy was fascinated by the clock as it struck out its "bong-bong-bong" with every hour.  And he loved the little musical melody it played before each hour and also on the quarter hour.  As Billy grew older, he found it a nuisance when he was trying to record music, and so he would silence the old man.  It followed us to Oregon and into each of the eight homes we have lived in.  Finding just the right wall for it to rest against was sometimes a challenge; other times that perfect wall just presented itself, as if it was waiting for just such a grand old clock.

Thirty four years is a very long time to grow fond of the sound of our Grandfather Clock.  I shall miss it, just as I miss every child that has moved on with his or her life.  It is strangely quiet now, as I am writing this.  It is 7:00 PM and there should be that wonderful melody playing and then "bong-bong-bong-bong-bong-bong-bong!":  But it is gone.  Good-bye, old man...I shall miss you, even if no one else does.

Winter, 2016...

Winter came on with a vengeance to the Oregon Coast this year.  In the 10 years that we have lived on the coast, I have never seen so much rain!  There were so many reports of severe flooding up and down the coast and in the Valley, too, that I wondered if we might just be getting ready to slide right into that big blue ocean.   And, of course, with the flooding, there were folks who were dis-lodged from their homes...literally!  Poor souls!  Getting to them to offer help would require a row boat...one of those early conveniences we seem to have gotten rid of!

Nature is and always has been a marvel to me.  In my 76 years on this earth and living in the U. S. of A, I have seen snow that burred vehicles on the roads, ice so thick that you might just as well have gotten out of your car and put on ice skates to get to whatever destination you were heading to...or perhaps, this would be a good time to bring back the good old fashioned sleigh.  Makes a body wonder if perhaps modern contraptions weren't such a good idea at all.  Sometimes I think we would have been better off if we had just hung on to some of the good old modes of transportation for winters such as those I have seen in Oregon, Utah and New Mexico.

Needless to say, we didn't go anywhere for the entire month.  Dean was on Jury Duty, so that also put an end to any plans we might have wanted to make.  So, we just stayed home, sloshed back and forth to work, shopping and such and had a wonderfully warm fire in our "gas" furnace/fireplace.
I didn't take any pictures in January, because gloom and doom just don't make for exciting pictures and I wasn't brave enough to get out there during a particularly heavy storm and take photos of the waves crashing up against the cliffs and around the lighthouse.  I'm sure it was a sight to behold, burt I just didn't brave the weather.  Maybe some other time.